What you already know- I’m the little dude that shoots people and makes them fall in love. What you don’t:I can’t stand candy hearts. And I think if all you love lost morons who think that a thorny flower and some empty calories are good ways to say “I Love You” fell off a cliff, Valentine’s Day wouldn’t be the most despised holiday of the year. That goes double for all you whiny “No one loves me enough so I’ll blame it on the calendar for reminding me” crowd. Here’s a love note for all yall: Valentine’s Day is not a conspiracy run by Floral and Greeting Card empires, IT’S A DAY TO BE LOVED DAMN IT! Ok. I feel better. Let’s continue.